truth hurts

Sephia - Sheila on 7

Hey,Sephia
Malam ini ku takkan datang
Ku coba 'tuk berpaling sayang
Dari cintamu
Hey,Sephia
Malam ini ku takkan pulang
Tak usah kau mencari aku,demi cintamu

Hadapilah ini
Kisah kita takkan abadi

Korus:

S'lamat tidur kekasih gelap ku
S'moga cepat kau lupakan aku
Kekasih sejatimu takkan pernah sanggup untuk melupakanmu

S'lamat tinggal kasih tak terungkap
S'moga kau lupakan aku cepat
Kekasih sejatimu takkan pernah sanggup untuk meninggalkanmu

Hey,Sephia
Jangan pernah panggil namaku
Bila kita bertemu lagi
Dilain hari

Hadapilah ini
Kisah kita takkan abadi

S'lamat tidur kekasih gelap ku [ooo.....Sephia]
S'moga cepat kau lupakan aku
Kekasih sejatimu takkan pernah sanggup untuk melupakanmu

S'lamat tinggal kasih tak terungkap [ooo.....Sephia]
S'moga kau lupakan aku cepat
Kekasih sejatimu takkan pernah sanggup untuk meninggalkanmu

---

This song is like Heaven.
n Hell..
in one..

Garhh!

Its so Nice.. n yet so goddam heartbreakingly Annoying!

hahaa..

Honestly..
cant really explain it..

but the tune..

its so nice.. that u jus wanna play it over n over..
but at the same time.. its too nice.. u cant stand hearing it again. :p
haha..
dont believe me?

Everytime the song reaches the Better part.. i find my self cursing..
haha..
Dont ask me why! :p

Not to mention the words...

I tot it was so cool the way he twisted the second line of the verses of the chorus.

The writers a lousy *toottoottoot*-ing bastard!
GAaaaRhH!
SO heartbreaking.
Seriously.
sighh..

Bastard.

i wanna punch him for saying such things..

SIGH!

Amazing, no?
To be able to write..
not only words that make ppl wanna kill u...
but at the same time, a tune that makes ppl wanna kill themselves..

Hmmm..

N den theres another song. Berhenti Berharap.
the music is SO totally heart wrenching!
seriously.

its like snatching out your heart.
n stamping on it.
over n over.

*poom*poom*poom*bEESSHhh*splat*

ish..

pepperspray

Far away

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go

Keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go

Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go

because of you

You know those rubber dividers on the roads?!
The red stick thingies with reflectors?!
You know how u find em bent n squashed n stuff?
N u wonder Who the Hell does Tat?!~

=P

Well..

My dad does..

Hahah!

(So much cooler if i cud have said i did..)

---

Theres so much more around

So many things ud never know


Yes, i have loads to blog about..

Dont think i will tho..

---

And i pick him up n ask him..

..Who is it Dopey?

...

well.. i love you den..

And i squeeze him tight..

the things i do for u eh?
send u for a bath too..

and the tears fall again tonight..

Se7en

N i didnt even know what being tagged was...

Seven things that I plan to do:

1. Start drumming lessons
2. Study
3. Drive without supervision
4. Get a tatoo. (temporary ones.. :p)
5. Do something worthwhile.. hopefully plural.. (too.. superficial.. lazy..)
6. Make amends..
7. Be better.. Much much better...

Seven things I can do:

1. Cry
2. Hurt (goes both ways i guess)
3. Hope
4. Care
5. Hide my feelings, sometimes
6. Hug
7. Love

Seven things I can't do:

1. Lie, most of the time
2. Act. same reasons
3. Stop caring
4. Be a better person
5. Be hardworking
6. Learn to save myself.. to stop hurting..
7. Make a difference

Seven things I say most often:

1. Bloody Hell.
2. What the Helll.
3. idiot.
4. Fine laaaa.
5. F***.
6. sigh..
7. ...

Seven people I want to tag:

1. Fabian. but hes a bloody lazy ass nowadays
2. unfortunately its gotta stop der...
3.
4.
5. i said!
6.
7. bye..

They were right... Wasnt looking forward to doing this.. But ended spending Alot of time on it... Dont really regret it... Gonna stop thinking now tho...

thumper

You Are 50% Weird

Normal enough to know that you're weird... But too damn weird to do anything about it!

How Weird Are You?

That is SO not true! =P

it never ends

U gave me peace, in a time of war..
-Archilles

There have always been
lists floating around
of what kind of man
every woman should wait for..

I think every man
should look for a woman
who gives him peace
in a time of war

who makes him smile
when hes sad
who brings him up
when hes down

whose mere presence
brings him comfort
who knows how to be there
even if its just quietly
who, just by being there
helps
instead of making things worse

I think every man
should know
tats wat he's looking for..

I think every man
should know
what hes looking for
is the woman
who can save him

 I'm learning to breathe
I'm learning to crawl
I'm finding that you and you alone can break my fall

saves everyone alot of trouble

something to know

Learning to Breathe - Switchfoot

Hello, good morning, how you do?
What makes your rising sun so new?
I could use a fresh beginning too
All of my regrets are nothing new
So this is the way that I say I need You
This is the way, This is the way that

I'm Learning to breathe
I'm learning to crawl
I'm finding that You and You alone can break my fall
I'm living again, awake and alive
I'm dying to breathe in these abundant skies

Hello, good morning, how you been?
Yesterday left my head kicked in
I never, never thought that
I would fall like that
Never knew that I could hurt this bad

I'm Learning to breathe
I'm learning to crawl
I'm finding that You and You alone can break my fall
I'm living again, awake and alive
I'm dying to breathe in these abundant skies

So this is the way that I say I need You
This is the way that I say I love You
This is the way that I say I'm Yours
This is the way, this is the way that

I'm Learning to breathe
I'm learning to crawl
I'm finding that You and You alone can break my fall
I'm living again, awake and alive
I'm dying to breathe in these abundant skies

unplayed piano

If you wanna know how i feel right now..
Go download the song..
The tune seems to mirror my current feelings exactly...

Even if you dont care bout how im feeling..
which is highly likely..
Download it anyways..
Nice song..

---

Unplayed Piano - Damien Rice & Lisa Hannigan

Come and see me
Sing me to sleep
Come and free me
Hold me if i need to weep
Maybe it's not the season
Maybe it's not the year
Maybe there's no good reason
Why i'm locked up inside
Just cause they wanna hide me
The moon goes bright
The darker they make my night

Unplayed pianos
Are often by a window
In a room where nobody loved goes
She sits alone with her silent song
Somebody bring her home

Unplayed piano
Still holds a tune
Lock on the lid
In a stale, stale room
Maybe it's not that easy
Or maybe it's not that hard
Maybe they could release me
Let the people decide
I've got nothing to hide
I've done nothing wrong
So why have i been here so long?

Unplayed pianos
Are often by a window
In a room where nobody loved goes
She sits alone with her silent song
Somebody bring her home

Unplayed pianos
Are often by a window
In a room where nobody loved goes
She sits alone with her silent song
Somebody bring her home

Unplayed piano
Still holds a tune
Years pass by
In the changing of the moon

---

Human beings were created to do many things. Loneliness is not one of them.
-desperate housewifes

watcha lookin for

Yesterday morning, I woke up really pissed n upset..

Im not Extremely sure what it was about..
But i have an idea..
Or atleast what i believed..
keeping in mind that i was rather groggy..

Didnt exactly go to bed the happiest of people..
But wat my mind believed was tat..
Was pissed because i had to wake up..
which meant waking up from a dream..
N waking up from This partIcular dream
wud make ANYONE Mad!

Guess what i was dreaming about

..
..
..

Brad Pitt.

(ok, admittedly.. i Do know Some people who Wudn't be Too mad about waking up from this but.. leeets jus gloss over that now shall we.. :p )

I mean.. COMe On!

Its Brad!
BraD PiTT!
WHY wudnt i Want to me Locked in a dream with him Eh?!
(Aside from the fact that he cheated on his wife n went off with someone else...)

=Ppp

From what i remember..
There was Brad sitting down somewhere..
N i was walking pass..
Something was going on in the background but i cant really remember wat..
(I mean, UnderStandbly! All i care about was Me n Brad ok???.. :p)
N he pulled me
to sit on his lap
(HahA! Yes i Know! Shudup!)
N i distinctly remember reaching over to play with his den short spiky hair.. before being woken up by my alarm.. (or AtLeast thats all im SayiN! :P)
HAHA!

Ok ShuduP n Listen!
Its not my fault OK!
It was a Dream! :p
N it Was only the First time i've dreamt of Brad.. :P

BESIDES!
it wasn't Purely Brad Pitt i think..
Thats just what my mind told me..
He didnt eXactly look like him..
20-ish.. young.. handsome ofcourse..
slim instead of built like Brad is..
nah.. the only reason why it was Bras was because tat was wat i was told.. :p

I Think..
there was an element of someone else in him...

There were also a couple aspects of different dreams i think.. that had some significance...
But i cant remember...

So Anyways!
As i set my alarm to snooze continuously for about half an hour every morning..
Basically i was upset yet amused yesterday morning..
Waking up n snoozing the alarm..
Cursing away about havin Brad taken from me..
N drowsily falling half asleep, still cursing away..
n waking up again every 5 minutes..

=P

Same thing happened this morning too tho..
Woke up upset n pissed..
But! No dreams about Brad...

=P


I DO remember being allowed to play with his hair tho.. =P

like waves

tripe

lies

change

a turn

another

impossibility

stupidity

fair

deceive

obvious

consideration

pain

game

unbelievable

sensitive

speed

men

think

fantasy

dry now

never


Dont think.
Dont know.

Say such things.
Think such things.
Do such things.

...

Time

Tell


Over.

Stranger than your sympathy

No one ever gets it eh..

---

Sympathy - Goo Goo Dolls

Stranger than your sympathy
This is my apology
I'm killing myself from the inside out
All my fears have pushed you out

I wish for things that I don't need
All I wanted
And what I chase won't set me free
All I wanted
And I get scared but I'm not crawling on my knees

Oh yeah everything's all wrong yeah
Everything's all wrong yeah
Where the hell did I think I was

Stranger than your sympathy
I take these things so I don't feel
I'm killing myself form the inside out
Now my head's been filled with doubt

It's hard to lead the life you choose
All I wanted
When all your luck's run out on you
All I wanted
You can't see when all your dreams are coming true

Oh yeah it's easy to forget yeah
You choke on the regrets yeah
Who the hell did I think I was

Stranger than your sympathy
All these thoughts you stole from me
I'm not sure where I belong
Nowhere's home and I'm all wrong

And I wasn't all the things
I tried to make believe I was
And I wouldn't be the one to kneel
Before the dreams I wanted
And all the talk and all the lies
Were all the empty things disguised as me

Yeah stranger than your sympathy
Stranger than your sympathy

again

I know u guys dont read lyrics if i post them..
No music n all.. kinda pointless to read i guess..
But since practically no one reads my blog anyways might as well right.
Too bad im not premium.. cant play music tho i'd love too.. heh.

---

To Make You Feel My Love - Josh Kelley

When the rain is blowing in your face
And the whole world is on your case
I could offer you a warm embrace
To make u feel my love

When the evening shadows and the stars appear
And theres no one there to dry your tears
I could hold u for a million years
To make you feel my love

Ooh i know u havent made your mind up yet
But i will never do u wrong
I knew it from the moment that we met
No doubt in my mind we'd belong

Id go hungry, id go black and blue
Id go crawling down the avenue
No theres nothing that i wudnt do
To make u feel my love

hmmm.....

Oh the storms raging on the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
The winds of change are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing like me yet

I could make you happy make your dreams come true
No, theres nothing that i wouldnt do
I'll go to the ends of the earth for you

To make you feel my love (4)

May Angels lead you in

I like this song..
Think it shud be played at my funeral..
Tho knowing im not that lucky..
I'll probably last a few more years. heh. :p
Prob come up with another song by then hmm?

Id also like to play this for ppls funeral...
(Not that id get a say in it..)
But id much rather you guys take care of urself..
so i wudnt ever have to..

heh..

Sounds so good..
If only i cud play it for u.. (HERE i mean!)

---

Hear You Me (May angels lead you in) - Jimmy Eat World

There's no one in town I know
You gave us some place to go.
I never said thank you for that.
I thought I might get one more chance.

What would you think of me now,
so lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that,
now I'll never have a chance.

May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.

So what would you think of me now,
so lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that,
now I'll never have a chance.

May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.

May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.

And if you were with me tonight,
I'd sing to you just one more time.
A song for a heart so big,
God wouldn't let it live.

May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.

May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.

On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.

---

May angels lead you in..
Watch over you when no one can..
Drive away your sorrows..
Lighten your heart..
So you can smile again.

exasperation

Malaysian censorship board at its all time high.

Yesterday, i was watching the nanny on Hallmark. (There was NOTHING better to do. Yes i was TAT sad.. or am.. watever...) (Jus the last Part of it! :( )
Anyways, I swear..
I SWear they censored the word stupid!
TWICE!!!

---

Earlier last week or something.
Was watching Married to the Kellys.

Basically, Tom breaks a promise to his wife, Susan, that he wud join up with her n her family once he was done with work. Instead he went to a bar to catch a game with the plumber.
He figured, 'shes with her family, she'll be alright.'
Surprisingly, they both end up at the same bar/restaurant. (surprisingly because, i tot he wud have known where she was going.. useless..)
N Duh, shes mad at him.
He apologises for dumping her n embarassing her in front of her family but she claims tat he doesnt get it.
He tries All kinds of ways to show her hes sorry. N i mean, All Kinds.
Making her breakfast in bed. Sending her flowers. A huge ass teddy bear. He EVEN Asked her sister what was it tat he didnt get. (N God tats a good one. Usually, if a guy does something wrong, its HIGHLY advisable to put in the effort to find out wats wrong.)
But she Still remains that he doesnt get it. Surprising. Coz after all the things he did.. she jus went on saying that he doesnt get it. I mean, I get tat he doesnt get it. But pity the poor guy n show some appreciation la. Poor fella. haha..

In the end, he figures it out after watching a scene between her parents.
She was upset because, Its not tat she wud have been alright with her family, she only wanted to be with him. She wud have given up going out with her family just to stay at home with him. Coz it was all about being together.

I didnt figure it out before he did. But id like to think it was because i wasnt paying attention to one part of it. Coz i totally get it.. Haha..

---

Harry Potter.
Dammit i SO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO wanna watch Harry Potter!
:'(
so upset.
sigh..

the trailer..
went n said something bout blablabla all these danger.. will Harry Potter survive it n stuff..
But i mean, DUH!!!!
Besides the fact that hes ONLY (this is SO bimbo. Harha!) the Main character in the show.
Books 5 AND 6, HARRY POTTER n the Order of the Phoenix, n HARRY POTTER n the Half Blood Prince have Already been Printed!
How the hell do u have books titled Tat without a Harry Potter in it?!

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmph

I SO wanna watch it...
dunno why...
the darkness in it all is so appealing..
aihh...

---

Wat are you guys all doing tonight?
Coz im so god damned bored.

want peanut butter.

barely breathing

Aha

Apparently

I can excercise control!

They think i cant

but i can!

;)

Yes i can

(some measure of it atleast.. sigh..)

..

---

If something is prominent n apparent

is everybody going crazy

in several aspects of your life

is anybody gonna save me

..

you know you're doomed..

is there a right way?

i never learn..

---

Respect.

its not actually as easy as it sounds.

sometimes..

can anybody tell me whats going on

sometimes knowing

tell me whats going on

doesnt help.

---

Being a libran

its only right

if both scales match

but they tilt

or worse

when they think they tilt

fluctuations?

all tilting with a price

death of a libran

but she doesnt know how..

---

bitching is therapeutic.

unfortunately i am denied that pleasure.

therefore, a movie would be great right about now.

no movies for ms. flurry

also

i need Potter

the potty bastard.

Gah!

guess i'll grab a lil potty time too..

---

I tried to save myself.

but it didnt work.

it wont work.

Somebody saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaave me!

I tried.

i never learn.

no i never learn.

but how can i, if u wont teach me?

the monster

The night is black tonight..

Darker than the already dark night.
Darker than normalcy would permit..
Darker than normality allows it to be..

For me.

Darker than the darker nights actually

Not just one side of it.

North. South. East. West.

Four of them around me..
The four I know in my life..
And more.
yes theres more...

I'd like to turn the lights off tonight

And I know..
I know it wont go bright tomorrow..

Try or not.. it doesnt know how..

Some say you have to take it..
Face the darkness n the world will be brighter in its time..
Brighter den the bright you knew..

Dont i?
Dont i already..
yes.. i do..
whine n rant.. true..
but melted n docile..

Already it proves that it cant.. wont.. doesnt know how..

The wrong way they say..
But i cant..
I too dont know how..

Tonight..
Tonight I go to sleep..
in the dark...

N tomorrow?..
Tomorrow i live again..

Just like i have been

relations

Watched One Tree Hill season one finale.
Dam good lo..
I love the show.
no matter wat fabian says. heh. (OC sucks!)
always do get sad watching it. hah..

It was a weird.. compiled episode..
stuff to note.
Dan saying 'U better hope i die' wen Deb catches him having a heart attack was a classic. haha.. Tat was so unbelievably stupif n fake lo..
N to think she came over to his place just seconds after messaging him a 'call me'..
Jus shows that shows need their 'bad guy' to survive to further terrorise the good guys..
wu liao

It was kinda odd n complicated wen they portrayed him as the bad guy.. But den showed him saying he loves Karen n Deb n Nathan n how he wanted to be a part of Lucas's life.
haha..
Guess he had 'good intentions' but didnt know wat to do about them. Being a natural ass n all..
Guess he wanted to do good.. but still ended up doing bad.. which still makes it his fault anyways.
But seriously.. Dam kesian for him last episode..
What with Nathan standing up to him n striping his name from the jersey. (Ouch! That so totally hurt! heh.) He love Nathan, that we all know.. But that was kinda stupid anywas.. He is still gonna be a Scott so whatfor.. hah.. show off oni..
Pissed.. but a lil bit padan muka (only say this cause hes a bad guy.) when he cudnt say what he wanted to say to Keith.
Den hes all dejected n all n he goes over to Debs place.. n finds her naked with Keith. Wohohoo! That Totally must have stung like nobodies business. ouchies!
(Anybody wonder how Deb n Keith got a blanket to cover dem n a mat under dem.. im sure it was totally spontaneous.. =P)

N eventho i knew that Nathan n Hailey were gonna get married..
When she told Lucas about it, i Still had to go
wadaheell

so weird.

Lucas has a cry-ey face =P
He likes to show his im-so-sad-n-hurt-but-i-have-to-do-this-u-must-feel-sympathetic-for-me-cry-now face.
i think its the only face he has.
Hot tho.

Nathan n Hailey. Still weird man.
But hot too.

GOD! was this pointless again. =P

Oh n at the end of it.. They played Run. One of my favourite songs.
SO COOL! Yay!

---

Keith: We fell in love.. And at some point.. The people we loved forgot to love us back...

smelly feet

When i turn on my speaker n put on my earphones,
I hear quiet buzzing.

Its like a subliminal message..
playing..
into my brain..
telling me to..
I dunno..
Kill someone?

Hasn't work so far tho.. Hmmmmmm...

I think i've noticed it playing..
in the background of certain songs..
whispering sweet nothings.. evil instructions..
into my innocent mind..

(OH GOD THE MESSAGE IS STILL PLAYING IN BETWEEN SONGS!!! NOOOOOOOO)

Alcoholic
Its mood n tune
seems to enhance the subliminal-ness of the subliminal message buzzing..
no wait
haha
i mean the mood it sets
seems to enhance the
erm
subliminal-ness of the sublim..
ah hell i jus like tat word.

Its a good tune anyways..

(THE BUZZING IS STILL GOING ON!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!)

maybe
maybe i was wrong
maybe
maybe it isnt telling me to kill someone

(IT WONT GO AWAY!! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE)

maybe its just der to drive me insane.
(which might lead me to kill myself. den i Wont be wrong! Heh!)

BOY was this a pointless blog. heh.

---

I like black. obviously.

---

I actually FOUND the IT dvd!
The Scary clown show from waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back that somehow everyone agrees is the Scariest show alive!
(the shows alive?)

There was this odd coincidence involved where i got it/It (works both ways) for someone.. who got it from someone else the day i got it for him.
Dam..

Anywho
I Watched it/It (Haha!)
Halfway atleast..
Wasnt all too bad/scary actually..
Im guessing it was because we were Reeaaally insy bitsy tiny teeny back den when we first watched it..
or maybe it was the company...?
Hmmmm..
Altho i have to admit.. the Clown on the cover? is steeeel creepy...

Gotta watch Emily Rose.
That outta scare me.