My First

Missed my blog entries?!
U jus miss me talking bout U dun u! :p
Useless jerk.

Isnt it bad enough that i SO havent been studying...?
N u so noe why... =P
n i shud stop sayin so coz its so really bimbo-like =D

i dunno...
all i wanna talk about wud be us...
sorta
But alot of it is private isnt it?
hai...

well, how about updates for them?
(Hey Liny! :) Thnx for dropping by! I know ure really busy n stressed out there! Chill ok?! *hugs* )

We broke up...
hahahahahahaha
Well we did.
on Sunday.
When were we together again?
Hahahaha....
long story...

But the things is, after we 'broke up'...I felt so So much more for u...More then beFore we 'broke up'...

So that was Sunday...
N with how things were goin, how we were feeling..., i thought they were kinda perfect...
But then Monday came...
The 1st day i actually studied btw. Haha...more or less la...
Until the last 5 minutes...
screwed us up... :)

N they have No idea wat im saying...
Does it matter?
Im too lazy to bother (sorry guys..)
Too lazy to even bother about my exams....
My actual AS exams...
...

The tables have twisted n turned too much... :p
since i last blogged...
wats tat? 9 days? :/
hmm...

Well lets say...alot of those last few posts no longer apply...
~Like how i cant picture myself with him?!
HAH! Long gone down the drains! *grins*!
~N how i dont know how he feels?
Well, i guess i do now...
I felt ur heart dear......unless it WAS just the hormones! =P
~About the girl?
Well.....its sorta settled...i hope... :P
See? Im still selfish...
~N also how stongly i felt? ....
*sigh*...u noe my prob...*sighs*...

Well, I'll tell u wat I DO noe...
I have feelings for u...
I think of u when my eyes open (not neccessarily 'wake up' hehe)
I miss ur messages
I miss u
I wanna be with u
I wanna talk to u
I wanna be in ur arms
I love touching u (err....Sick twisted Minds!!! Not THERE!)
I dont mind u touching me...(err....I DONT have to explain it to u guys! :P)

There might be a million reasons to these things...besides the apparently obvious One..
Lets hear some of them eh?
U can ALL tell me wat u think...
Im too lazy to think...

sorry...not now k...too many thoughts...

Hmm...Boston Public repeat. See i getta watch. :)
Hrmmm...Seen it before though...
on Singapore tv...

Collide is playing as usual...
It makes me sad sometimes u noe...a little...
love the song...
it pulls out my emotions...
something like tat...
Let make it our song? Whether we will be together or not it doesnt matter...
lets make Collide our song...
Ure gonna have to dance with me to it some day... *smiles*

Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I finally find, U n I Collide...

hmmm

I cant think when its playing btw...

I think i had quite some stuff to say...
but as usual i think too much n now ive forgotten...

Shouldn't a relationship build up on time? Even if you love this guy - take the time to get to know him.. you've prolly only seen 1 side of him.
How about that hmm?
Yea...
Lets wait now k...
Lets take some sort of a break...take our time...
We probably have plenty...
I Dun mean from each other...i cud never do that...
Lets do what we feel like doing, what we want to do...With boundaries n limits in mind of course...
As in...we can spend time together...id love that...but lets cut out all the other stuff hmm?

Oh btw, I was right!
ALOT of things did happen n develop in 2 months...
Heck it took 2 weeks! (or less than tat! haha!)

I've never felt for a guy the way i feel for u...
I've never done or wud have allowed any of the things that happened between us, to happen with any other guy....in my life so far....
I've never shared so much with anyone....
ok well, not so much, not the amount of it (after all ive only known u for 2 weeks!), but the extent of the sharing...
Nobody in this world knows what u noe about me...
I've actually made myself vulnerable around you by doing the things i do with u....telling u the things i tell u...
N yet, u are ultimately (so far) the one that is at risk.....
Maybe we both have.....Maybe we're both playerz.....
N yet, (seeing as to how things are going) im probably the better player! (Not to mention kisser! hahaha)

u noe, i was probably (definitely) right about the feelings thingy...
How how we feel affects how we feel...hahaha

Shall we give ourselves some time?
Some time to figure things out.
Some time to learn, to feel, to fall...

Shall we give this a chance?
Selfishly, if u dun have anywhere else to go.....Stay....
Selfishly, if u do.......*sigh*.....i dont wanna think about that now...

Its 12.45pm
I cant believe ure not awake yet!!!
Jerk!
N i cant believe u did not reply my msg!!!!
My last msg was just frikin scary ok!!!
It was still buggin me somewhere deep inside my mind when my mum came online!!
Sub-consciousness n consciousness got errr unconscious?
mised up n forgot wat actually did happen n wat was jus in my dream...

Anyways....i shud go now....
SpenT my morning writing this!
I hope ure Happy! =P
Why d'ya even bother anyways?
Shudn't u be studying?!
Shudn't we all?!?! *grins*

OK...goin off now...

~bye~

NOTE: Hey guys...Hmmm maybe i didnt express myself properly. :p That 'break up' that i talked about...It was just un-officialising things...coz i freaked out on him after we became 'official'. We didnt actually fight n not talk to each other or anything...Like i said...i felt more for him then...Its jus tat...well stuff happened on Monday...
Anyways, yea...we're sorta taking a break...slowing down things...we still spend time together (or plan to) shudnt have rushed into things...its only been 2 weeks...We're not over yet...

N Shaf, if we ever were to not be together...in a relationship, or watever...u are still special to me...N always will be...I hope that we'll be...jus as we are...or something like tat...
U mean alot to me...U always will...
After all, IM the one with the good track record with the exes! *grins*
love u...
Might not be the kind of love that u feel for me, or wish that i felt for u...
not yet
but i ...care for u...
*Hugs*