the story of my life

Do you really think that after suicide, your soul is condemned to hell for eternity?

now now dont get all emo-psychopathic-paranoid on me
its just a question.

i just think that its rather harsh....
although technically if u already believe in hell (not that i do or dont)
den its just a matter of how u view the particular sin right.

coz if u believe, like it is written that you should, that suicide is a mortal sin or the worse sin or watever u call it (sorry, im obviously not well versed with the book)
den you ofcourse would accept that it is equally as bad to take your own life as it is to take say anothers. (or worse maybe, like i said, i dont know.)
den ofcourse said suicide commiter would den belong in the fiery depths that we tend to accept that the rest of them 'evil' do-ers belong.

but as i havnt been led to believe that taking your own life is as bad as the rest
i find it harder to accept that hell is where u'll have to go to after all your troubles
(i mean yea ofcourse u dun get rewarded n stuff, but hold on)
yea for me, its just easier when u think about other sins right.
though hell is kinda a harsh punishment for anyone..
but to believe in a divine being, and/or in the afterlife, it would den be neccesary to accept some sort of heaven, and therefore, some sort of hell as well.
so den it is almost natural to assume that people who have been judge to not belong in the upper class one, get send down to the underground basement.

i mean to take your own life would be after having gone through some shit right.
though ofcourse you shouldnt. n ofcourse its not right. n ofcourse there are better way den it n other ppl can n have done it..
it does happen.
n the deed is done.
n after all that you're stuck in, according to whatshisface, inferno dude, errrr Dante! yes. if i not mistaken,
a tree stump. stuck in your hated form for an eternity. unable to move or do anything.
(no i havnt actually read his piece. it was in poem like form, whatever u call it.. not tat intellectual.(me i mean) though i wud like an abridged version if theres one. anyways. yea, no havnt read. but read a book that was semi based on it n stuff. still completely based on memory n cud be totally wrong ofcourse. the tree stump thing. but u get the picture.)
yea in short, hell. (literally.)
to suffer even more n for forever.
(oo Yup. just checked on it. trees were right. =p. will read more on it later. linked ya.)

den.... like.. wtf right??
but yea.. tats why ure not supposed to do it.

n i guess if i think of it the way i put it just now..
u obviously cant exactly expect to be rewarded for that now can you...

but still. watever it is.
i guess is becoz to me atleast.
suicide, the taking of ones life, it doesnt exactly harm others.
yes i know it does. hurt, pain, guilt, left behind.. but not in the way that ppl are normally banished to hell for y'noe..
At the gates, they dont go like, Y'noe John, Mate, I see here ure a fine dude n all that, never stole, never murdered, never even commited adultery i see! tho u were coming quite the close there weren't ya, ya dog you.. oh but wait.. lookie here.. wats this! U forgot ur mums 47th birthday! U were a whole day late! U broke her heart that day my boy that you did.. sorry friend.. down to hell u go.
(haha.. ok sorry for tat. anyways)
yea back to it
its the taking of your own life. your own.
so to me its like, wtf dude. leave the poor fella alone wont u. its His problem.

but i know thats because i wasnt brought up religiously in the first place.
n that there would be where u'll learn n accept, that your life is not actually Yours.
that its Gods.
n its therefore not yours to take.

messed up huh.

We're put here on earth to live not by choice as far as i can remember..
n when we go is not by choice either.
N when we try to take it in our hands coz we cudnt deal.
coz the hands that were dealt us just werent doin the trick..
we get sucked in n stuck in Another place we didnt want to go to.
why the hell?
what did we Do in the first place for all this to start?
Unasked, uncalled for..
the cursed apple?
n what was it doing in the garden den?
n why were Adam n Eve created?

toys for entertainment?
a test, a chance?

but den how many of u wud opt to not hav life to Begin with.
not that it gets taken away..
but to not have existed. never. to have been nothing at all. not a memory, not a past, not a drifting soul. but a before.
A before-life.

i know ive always thought that was the best deal.


i know.
its what we do in the time between (btwn being placed here n taken away) that matters.
but its still true that we didnt ask to be here.
but ok.
thats done.
we are.
yea fine, we'll do what we can huh.


but back again to the afterlife.
if the whole point of life, is its pain to appreciate the blessings..
den whats a (after)lifetime of pureness in heaven?
whats that?
wont we get tired of the happy?
or are angels immune to such human feelings.

i think a part of me believes in nothingness after life.
as in after we die
we just *poof* become nothing.
ur life runs out n leave ur body.
ur body is empty without a soul, n ur soul isnt whole without a body.
so, nothing.
i personally find that thats a better option.
that after our life that we've been put here to live has run its course
there jus isnt anymore.
n thats that.

what dyu think?

i guess we'll never know huh.
or atleast, never know wen we're in a position to put it down for other mortals to see. =/

Well
I think this article has just condemned me to hell.

Thank God (hopefully!) for Limbo huh.

How To Save A Life - The Fray

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life


How did you know?
The story of my life?

Anyone know where i can find the words that were in the video?

Maybe it was the praying.
or lack thereof.