If you wanna know how i feel right now..
Go download the song..
The tune seems to mirror my current feelings exactly...
Even if you dont care bout how im feeling..
which is highly likely..
Download it anyways..
Nice song..
Unplayed Piano - Damien Rice & Lisa Hannigan
Come and see me
Sing me to sleep
Come and free me
Hold me if i need to weep
Maybe it's not the season
Maybe it's not the year
Maybe there's no good reason
Why i'm locked up inside
Just cause they wanna hide me
The moon goes bright
The darker they make my night
Unplayed pianos
Are often by a window
In a room where nobody loved goes
She sits alone with her silent song
Somebody bring her home
Unplayed piano
Still holds a tune
Lock on the lid
In a stale, stale room
Maybe it's not that easy
Or maybe it's not that hard
Maybe they could release me
Let the people decide
I've got nothing to hide
I've done nothing wrong
So why have i been here so long?
Unplayed pianos
Are often by a window
In a room where nobody loved goes
She sits alone with her silent song
Somebody bring her home
Unplayed pianos
Are often by a window
In a room where nobody loved goes
She sits alone with her silent song
Somebody bring her home
Unplayed piano
Still holds a tune
Years pass by
In the changing of the moon
Human beings were created to do many things. Loneliness is not one of them.
-desperate housewifes
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
watcha lookin for
Yesterday morning, I woke up really pissed n upset..
Im not Extremely sure what it was about..
But i have an idea..
Or atleast what i believed..
keeping in mind that i was rather groggy..
Didnt exactly go to bed the happiest of people..
But wat my mind believed was tat..
Was pissed because i had to wake up..
which meant waking up from a dream..
N waking up from This partIcular dream
wud make ANYONE Mad!
Guess what i was dreaming about
..
..
..
Brad Pitt.
(ok, admittedly.. i Do know Some people who Wudn't be Too mad about waking up from this but.. leeets jus gloss over that now shall we.. :p )
I mean.. COMe On!
Its Brad!
BraD PiTT!
WHY wudnt i Want to me Locked in a dream with him Eh?!
(Aside from the fact that he cheated on his wife n went off with someone else...)
=Ppp
From what i remember..
There was Brad sitting down somewhere..
N i was walking pass..
Something was going on in the background but i cant really remember wat..
(I mean, UnderStandbly! All i care about was Me n Brad ok???.. :p)
N he pulled me
to sit on his lap
(HahA! Yes i Know! Shudup!)
N i distinctly remember reaching over to play with his den short spiky hair.. before being woken up by my alarm.. (or AtLeast thats all im SayiN! :P)
HAHA!
Ok ShuduP n Listen!
Its not my fault OK!
It was a Dream! :p
N it Was only the First time i've dreamt of Brad.. :P
BESIDES!
it wasn't Purely Brad Pitt i think..
Thats just what my mind told me..
He didnt eXactly look like him..
20-ish.. young.. handsome ofcourse..
slim instead of built like Brad is..
nah.. the only reason why it was Bras was because tat was wat i was told.. :p
I Think..
there was an element of someone else in him...
There were also a couple aspects of different dreams i think.. that had some significance...
But i cant remember...
So Anyways!
As i set my alarm to snooze continuously for about half an hour every morning..
Basically i was upset yet amused yesterday morning..
Waking up n snoozing the alarm..
Cursing away about havin Brad taken from me..
N drowsily falling half asleep, still cursing away..
n waking up again every 5 minutes..
=P
Same thing happened this morning too tho..
Woke up upset n pissed..
But! No dreams about Brad...
=P
I DO remember being allowed to play with his hair tho.. =P
Im not Extremely sure what it was about..
But i have an idea..
Or atleast what i believed..
keeping in mind that i was rather groggy..
Didnt exactly go to bed the happiest of people..
But wat my mind believed was tat..
Was pissed because i had to wake up..
which meant waking up from a dream..
N waking up from This partIcular dream
wud make ANYONE Mad!
Guess what i was dreaming about
..
..
..
Brad Pitt.
(ok, admittedly.. i Do know Some people who Wudn't be Too mad about waking up from this but.. leeets jus gloss over that now shall we.. :p )
I mean.. COMe On!
Its Brad!
BraD PiTT!
WHY wudnt i Want to me Locked in a dream with him Eh?!
(Aside from the fact that he cheated on his wife n went off with someone else...)
=Ppp
From what i remember..
There was Brad sitting down somewhere..
N i was walking pass..
Something was going on in the background but i cant really remember wat..
(I mean, UnderStandbly! All i care about was Me n Brad ok???.. :p)
N he pulled me
to sit on his lap
(HahA! Yes i Know! Shudup!)
N i distinctly remember reaching over to play with his den short spiky hair.. before being woken up by my alarm.. (or AtLeast thats all im SayiN! :P)
HAHA!
Ok ShuduP n Listen!
Its not my fault OK!
It was a Dream! :p
N it Was only the First time i've dreamt of Brad.. :P
BESIDES!
it wasn't Purely Brad Pitt i think..
Thats just what my mind told me..
He didnt eXactly look like him..
20-ish.. young.. handsome ofcourse..
slim instead of built like Brad is..
nah.. the only reason why it was Bras was because tat was wat i was told.. :p
I Think..
there was an element of someone else in him...
There were also a couple aspects of different dreams i think.. that had some significance...
But i cant remember...
So Anyways!
As i set my alarm to snooze continuously for about half an hour every morning..
Basically i was upset yet amused yesterday morning..
Waking up n snoozing the alarm..
Cursing away about havin Brad taken from me..
N drowsily falling half asleep, still cursing away..
n waking up again every 5 minutes..
=P
Same thing happened this morning too tho..
Woke up upset n pissed..
But! No dreams about Brad...
=P
I DO remember being allowed to play with his hair tho.. =P
Monday, November 14, 2005
like waves
tripe
lies
change
a turn
another
impossibility
stupidity
fair
deceive
obvious
consideration
pain
game
unbelievable
sensitive
speed
men
think
fantasy
dry now
never
Dont think.
Dont know.
Say such things.
Think such things.
Do such things.
...
Time
Tell
Over.
lies
change
a turn
another
impossibility
stupidity
fair
deceive
obvious
consideration
pain
game
unbelievable
sensitive
speed
men
think
fantasy
dry now
never
Dont think.
Dont know.
Say such things.
Think such things.
Do such things.
...
Time
Tell
Over.
Stranger than your sympathy
No one ever gets it eh..
Sympathy - Goo Goo Dolls
Stranger than your sympathy
This is my apology
I'm killing myself from the inside out
All my fears have pushed you out
I wish for things that I don't need
All I wanted
And what I chase won't set me free
All I wanted
And I get scared but I'm not crawling on my knees
Oh yeah everything's all wrong yeah
Everything's all wrong yeah
Where the hell did I think I was
Stranger than your sympathy
I take these things so I don't feel
I'm killing myself form the inside out
Now my head's been filled with doubt
It's hard to lead the life you choose
All I wanted
When all your luck's run out on you
All I wanted
You can't see when all your dreams are coming true
Oh yeah it's easy to forget yeah
You choke on the regrets yeah
Who the hell did I think I was
Stranger than your sympathy
All these thoughts you stole from me
I'm not sure where I belong
Nowhere's home and I'm all wrong
And I wasn't all the things
I tried to make believe I was
And I wouldn't be the one to kneel
Before the dreams I wanted
And all the talk and all the lies
Were all the empty things disguised as me
Yeah stranger than your sympathy
Stranger than your sympathy
Sympathy - Goo Goo Dolls
Stranger than your sympathy
This is my apology
I'm killing myself from the inside out
All my fears have pushed you out
I wish for things that I don't need
All I wanted
And what I chase won't set me free
All I wanted
And I get scared but I'm not crawling on my knees
Oh yeah everything's all wrong yeah
Everything's all wrong yeah
Where the hell did I think I was
Stranger than your sympathy
I take these things so I don't feel
I'm killing myself form the inside out
Now my head's been filled with doubt
It's hard to lead the life you choose
All I wanted
When all your luck's run out on you
All I wanted
You can't see when all your dreams are coming true
Oh yeah it's easy to forget yeah
You choke on the regrets yeah
Who the hell did I think I was
Stranger than your sympathy
All these thoughts you stole from me
I'm not sure where I belong
Nowhere's home and I'm all wrong
And I wasn't all the things
I tried to make believe I was
And I wouldn't be the one to kneel
Before the dreams I wanted
And all the talk and all the lies
Were all the empty things disguised as me
Yeah stranger than your sympathy
Stranger than your sympathy
Sunday, November 13, 2005
again
I know u guys dont read lyrics if i post them..
No music n all.. kinda pointless to read i guess..
But since practically no one reads my blog anyways might as well right.
Too bad im not premium.. cant play music tho i'd love too.. heh.
To Make You Feel My Love - Josh Kelley
When the rain is blowing in your face
And the whole world is on your case
I could offer you a warm embrace
To make u feel my love
When the evening shadows and the stars appear
And theres no one there to dry your tears
I could hold u for a million years
To make you feel my love
Ooh i know u havent made your mind up yet
But i will never do u wrong
I knew it from the moment that we met
No doubt in my mind we'd belong
Id go hungry, id go black and blue
Id go crawling down the avenue
No theres nothing that i wudnt do
To make u feel my love
hmmm.....
Oh the storms raging on the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
The winds of change are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing like me yet
I could make you happy make your dreams come true
No, theres nothing that i wouldnt do
I'll go to the ends of the earth for you
To make you feel my love (4)
No music n all.. kinda pointless to read i guess..
But since practically no one reads my blog anyways might as well right.
Too bad im not premium.. cant play music tho i'd love too.. heh.
To Make You Feel My Love - Josh Kelley
When the rain is blowing in your face
And the whole world is on your case
I could offer you a warm embrace
To make u feel my love
When the evening shadows and the stars appear
And theres no one there to dry your tears
I could hold u for a million years
To make you feel my love
Ooh i know u havent made your mind up yet
But i will never do u wrong
I knew it from the moment that we met
No doubt in my mind we'd belong
Id go hungry, id go black and blue
Id go crawling down the avenue
No theres nothing that i wudnt do
To make u feel my love
hmmm.....
Oh the storms raging on the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
The winds of change are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing like me yet
I could make you happy make your dreams come true
No, theres nothing that i wouldnt do
I'll go to the ends of the earth for you
To make you feel my love (4)
May Angels lead you in
I like this song..
Think it shud be played at my funeral..
Tho knowing im not that lucky..
I'll probably last a few more years. heh. :p
Prob come up with another song by then hmm?
Id also like to play this for ppls funeral...
(Not that id get a say in it..)
But id much rather you guys take care of urself..
so i wudnt ever have to..
heh..
Sounds so good..
If only i cud play it for u.. (HERE i mean!)
Hear You Me (May angels lead you in) - Jimmy Eat World
There's no one in town I know
You gave us some place to go.
I never said thank you for that.
I thought I might get one more chance.
What would you think of me now,
so lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that,
now I'll never have a chance.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
So what would you think of me now,
so lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that,
now I'll never have a chance.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
And if you were with me tonight,
I'd sing to you just one more time.
A song for a heart so big,
God wouldn't let it live.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in..
Watch over you when no one can..
Drive away your sorrows..
Lighten your heart..
So you can smile again.
Think it shud be played at my funeral..
Tho knowing im not that lucky..
I'll probably last a few more years. heh. :p
Prob come up with another song by then hmm?
Id also like to play this for ppls funeral...
(Not that id get a say in it..)
But id much rather you guys take care of urself..
so i wudnt ever have to..
heh..
Sounds so good..
If only i cud play it for u.. (HERE i mean!)
Hear You Me (May angels lead you in) - Jimmy Eat World
There's no one in town I know
You gave us some place to go.
I never said thank you for that.
I thought I might get one more chance.
What would you think of me now,
so lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that,
now I'll never have a chance.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
So what would you think of me now,
so lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that,
now I'll never have a chance.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
And if you were with me tonight,
I'd sing to you just one more time.
A song for a heart so big,
God wouldn't let it live.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.
May angels lead you in..
Watch over you when no one can..
Drive away your sorrows..
Lighten your heart..
So you can smile again.
Saturday, November 12, 2005
exasperation
Malaysian censorship board at its all time high.
Yesterday, i was watching the nanny on Hallmark. (There was NOTHING better to do. Yes i was TAT sad.. or am.. watever...) (Jus the last Part of it! :( )
Anyways, I swear..
I SWear they censored the word stupid!
TWICE!!!
Earlier last week or something.
Was watching Married to the Kellys.
Basically, Tom breaks a promise to his wife, Susan, that he wud join up with her n her family once he was done with work. Instead he went to a bar to catch a game with the plumber.
He figured, 'shes with her family, she'll be alright.'
Surprisingly, they both end up at the same bar/restaurant. (surprisingly because, i tot he wud have known where she was going.. useless..)
N Duh, shes mad at him.
He apologises for dumping her n embarassing her in front of her family but she claims tat he doesnt get it.
He tries All kinds of ways to show her hes sorry. N i mean, All Kinds.
Making her breakfast in bed. Sending her flowers. A huge ass teddy bear. He EVEN Asked her sister what was it tat he didnt get. (N God tats a good one. Usually, if a guy does something wrong, its HIGHLY advisable to put in the effort to find out wats wrong.)
But she Still remains that he doesnt get it. Surprising. Coz after all the things he did.. she jus went on saying that he doesnt get it. I mean, I get tat he doesnt get it. But pity the poor guy n show some appreciation la. Poor fella. haha..
In the end, he figures it out after watching a scene between her parents.
She was upset because, Its not tat she wud have been alright with her family, she only wanted to be with him. She wud have given up going out with her family just to stay at home with him. Coz it was all about being together.
I didnt figure it out before he did. But id like to think it was because i wasnt paying attention to one part of it. Coz i totally get it.. Haha..
Harry Potter.
Dammit i SO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO wanna watch Harry Potter!
:'(
so upset.
sigh..
the trailer..
went n said something bout blablabla all these danger.. will Harry Potter survive it n stuff..
But i mean, DUH!!!!
Besides the fact that hes ONLY (this is SO bimbo. Harha!) the Main character in the show.
Books 5 AND 6, HARRY POTTER n the Order of the Phoenix, n HARRY POTTER n the Half Blood Prince have Already been Printed!
How the hell do u have books titled Tat without a Harry Potter in it?!
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmph
I SO wanna watch it...
dunno why...
the darkness in it all is so appealing..
aihh...
Wat are you guys all doing tonight?
Coz im so god damned bored.
want peanut butter.
Yesterday, i was watching the nanny on Hallmark. (There was NOTHING better to do. Yes i was TAT sad.. or am.. watever...) (Jus the last Part of it! :( )
Anyways, I swear..
I SWear they censored the word stupid!
TWICE!!!
Earlier last week or something.
Was watching Married to the Kellys.
Basically, Tom breaks a promise to his wife, Susan, that he wud join up with her n her family once he was done with work. Instead he went to a bar to catch a game with the plumber.
He figured, 'shes with her family, she'll be alright.'
Surprisingly, they both end up at the same bar/restaurant. (surprisingly because, i tot he wud have known where she was going.. useless..)
N Duh, shes mad at him.
He apologises for dumping her n embarassing her in front of her family but she claims tat he doesnt get it.
He tries All kinds of ways to show her hes sorry. N i mean, All Kinds.
Making her breakfast in bed. Sending her flowers. A huge ass teddy bear. He EVEN Asked her sister what was it tat he didnt get. (N God tats a good one. Usually, if a guy does something wrong, its HIGHLY advisable to put in the effort to find out wats wrong.)
But she Still remains that he doesnt get it. Surprising. Coz after all the things he did.. she jus went on saying that he doesnt get it. I mean, I get tat he doesnt get it. But pity the poor guy n show some appreciation la. Poor fella. haha..
In the end, he figures it out after watching a scene between her parents.
She was upset because, Its not tat she wud have been alright with her family, she only wanted to be with him. She wud have given up going out with her family just to stay at home with him. Coz it was all about being together.
I didnt figure it out before he did. But id like to think it was because i wasnt paying attention to one part of it. Coz i totally get it.. Haha..
Harry Potter.
Dammit i SO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO wanna watch Harry Potter!
:'(
so upset.
sigh..
the trailer..
went n said something bout blablabla all these danger.. will Harry Potter survive it n stuff..
But i mean, DUH!!!!
Besides the fact that hes ONLY (this is SO bimbo. Harha!) the Main character in the show.
Books 5 AND 6, HARRY POTTER n the Order of the Phoenix, n HARRY POTTER n the Half Blood Prince have Already been Printed!
How the hell do u have books titled Tat without a Harry Potter in it?!
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmph
I SO wanna watch it...
dunno why...
the darkness in it all is so appealing..
aihh...
Wat are you guys all doing tonight?
Coz im so god damned bored.
want peanut butter.
Friday, November 11, 2005
barely breathing
Aha
Apparently
I can excercise control!
They think i cant
but i can!
;)
Yes i can
(some measure of it atleast.. sigh..)
..
If something is prominent n apparent
is everybody going crazy
in several aspects of your life
is anybody gonna save me
..
you know you're doomed..
is there a right way?
i never learn..
Respect.
its not actually as easy as it sounds.
sometimes..
can anybody tell me whats going on
sometimes knowing
tell me whats going on
doesnt help.
Being a libran
its only right
if both scales match
but they tilt
or worse
when they think they tilt
fluctuations?
all tilting with a price
death of a libran
but she doesnt know how..
bitching is therapeutic.
unfortunately i am denied that pleasure.
therefore, a movie would be great right about now.
no movies for ms. flurry
also
i need Potter
the potty bastard.
Gah!
guess i'll grab a lil potty time too..
I tried to save myself.
but it didnt work.
it wont work.
Somebody saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaave me!
I tried.
i never learn.
no i never learn.
but how can i, if u wont teach me?
Thursday, November 10, 2005
the monster
The night is black tonight..
Darker than the already dark night.
Darker than normalcy would permit..
Darker than normality allows it to be..
For me.
Darker than the darker nights actually
Not just one side of it.
North. South. East. West.
Four of them around me..
The four I know in my life..
And more.
yes theres more...
I'd like to turn the lights off tonight
And I know..
I know it wont go bright tomorrow..
Try or not.. it doesnt know how..
Some say you have to take it..
Face the darkness n the world will be brighter in its time..
Brighter den the bright you knew..
Dont i?
Dont i already..
yes.. i do..
whine n rant.. true..
but melted n docile..
Already it proves that it cant.. wont.. doesnt know how..
The wrong way they say..
But i cant..
I too dont know how..
Tonight..
Tonight I go to sleep..
in the dark...
N tomorrow?..
Tomorrow i live again..
Just like i have been
Darker than the already dark night.
Darker than normalcy would permit..
Darker than normality allows it to be..
For me.
Darker than the darker nights actually
Not just one side of it.
North. South. East. West.
Four of them around me..
The four I know in my life..
And more.
yes theres more...
I'd like to turn the lights off tonight
And I know..
I know it wont go bright tomorrow..
Try or not.. it doesnt know how..
Some say you have to take it..
Face the darkness n the world will be brighter in its time..
Brighter den the bright you knew..
Dont i?
Dont i already..
yes.. i do..
whine n rant.. true..
but melted n docile..
Already it proves that it cant.. wont.. doesnt know how..
The wrong way they say..
But i cant..
I too dont know how..
Tonight..
Tonight I go to sleep..
in the dark...
N tomorrow?..
Tomorrow i live again..
Just like i have been
relations
Watched One Tree Hill season one finale.
Dam good lo..
I love the show.
no matter wat fabian says. heh. (OC sucks!)
always do get sad watching it. hah..
It was a weird.. compiled episode..
stuff to note.
Dan saying 'U better hope i die' wen Deb catches him having a heart attack was a classic. haha.. Tat was so unbelievably stupif n fake lo..
N to think she came over to his place just seconds after messaging him a 'call me'..
Jus shows that shows need their 'bad guy' to survive to further terrorise the good guys..
wu liao
It was kinda odd n complicated wen they portrayed him as the bad guy.. But den showed him saying he loves Karen n Deb n Nathan n how he wanted to be a part of Lucas's life.
haha..
Guess he had 'good intentions' but didnt know wat to do about them. Being a natural ass n all..
Guess he wanted to do good.. but still ended up doing bad.. which still makes it his fault anyways.
But seriously.. Dam kesian for him last episode..
What with Nathan standing up to him n striping his name from the jersey. (Ouch! That so totally hurt! heh.) He love Nathan, that we all know.. But that was kinda stupid anywas.. He is still gonna be a Scott so whatfor.. hah.. show off oni..
Pissed.. but a lil bit padan muka (only say this cause hes a bad guy.) when he cudnt say what he wanted to say to Keith.
Den hes all dejected n all n he goes over to Debs place.. n finds her naked with Keith. Wohohoo! That Totally must have stung like nobodies business. ouchies!
(Anybody wonder how Deb n Keith got a blanket to cover dem n a mat under dem.. im sure it was totally spontaneous.. =P)
N eventho i knew that Nathan n Hailey were gonna get married..
When she told Lucas about it, i Still had to go
wadaheell
so weird.
Lucas has a cry-ey face =P
He likes to show his im-so-sad-n-hurt-but-i-have-to-do-this-u-must-feel-sympathetic-for-me-cry-now face.
i think its the only face he has.
Hot tho.
Nathan n Hailey. Still weird man.
But hot too.
GOD! was this pointless again. =P
Oh n at the end of it.. They played Run. One of my favourite songs.
SO COOL! Yay!
Keith: We fell in love.. And at some point.. The people we loved forgot to love us back...
Dam good lo..
I love the show.
no matter wat fabian says. heh. (OC sucks!)
always do get sad watching it. hah..
It was a weird.. compiled episode..
stuff to note.
Dan saying 'U better hope i die' wen Deb catches him having a heart attack was a classic. haha.. Tat was so unbelievably stupif n fake lo..
N to think she came over to his place just seconds after messaging him a 'call me'..
Jus shows that shows need their 'bad guy' to survive to further terrorise the good guys..
wu liao
It was kinda odd n complicated wen they portrayed him as the bad guy.. But den showed him saying he loves Karen n Deb n Nathan n how he wanted to be a part of Lucas's life.
haha..
Guess he had 'good intentions' but didnt know wat to do about them. Being a natural ass n all..
Guess he wanted to do good.. but still ended up doing bad.. which still makes it his fault anyways.
But seriously.. Dam kesian for him last episode..
What with Nathan standing up to him n striping his name from the jersey. (Ouch! That so totally hurt! heh.) He love Nathan, that we all know.. But that was kinda stupid anywas.. He is still gonna be a Scott so whatfor.. hah.. show off oni..
Pissed.. but a lil bit padan muka (only say this cause hes a bad guy.) when he cudnt say what he wanted to say to Keith.
Den hes all dejected n all n he goes over to Debs place.. n finds her naked with Keith. Wohohoo! That Totally must have stung like nobodies business. ouchies!
(Anybody wonder how Deb n Keith got a blanket to cover dem n a mat under dem.. im sure it was totally spontaneous.. =P)
N eventho i knew that Nathan n Hailey were gonna get married..
When she told Lucas about it, i Still had to go
wadaheell
so weird.
Lucas has a cry-ey face =P
He likes to show his im-so-sad-n-hurt-but-i-have-to-do-this-u-must-feel-sympathetic-for-me-cry-now face.
i think its the only face he has.
Hot tho.
Nathan n Hailey. Still weird man.
But hot too.
GOD! was this pointless again. =P
Oh n at the end of it.. They played Run. One of my favourite songs.
SO COOL! Yay!
Keith: We fell in love.. And at some point.. The people we loved forgot to love us back...
smelly feet
When i turn on my speaker n put on my earphones,
I hear quiet buzzing.
Its like a subliminal message..
playing..
into my brain..
telling me to..
I dunno..
Kill someone?
Hasn't work so far tho.. Hmmmmmm...
I think i've noticed it playing..
in the background of certain songs..
whispering sweet nothings.. evil instructions..
into my innocent mind..
(OH GOD THE MESSAGE IS STILL PLAYING IN BETWEEN SONGS!!! NOOOOOOOO)
Alcoholic
Its mood n tune
seems to enhance the subliminal-ness of the subliminal message buzzing..
no wait
haha
i mean the mood it sets
seems to enhance the
erm
subliminal-ness of the sublim..
ah hell i jus like tat word.
Its a good tune anyways..
(THE BUZZING IS STILL GOING ON!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!)
maybe
maybe i was wrong
maybe
maybe it isnt telling me to kill someone
(IT WONT GO AWAY!! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE)
maybe its just der to drive me insane.
(which might lead me to kill myself. den i Wont be wrong! Heh!)
BOY was this a pointless blog. heh.
I like black. obviously.
I actually FOUND the IT dvd!
The Scary clown show from waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back that somehow everyone agrees is the Scariest show alive!
(the shows alive?)
There was this odd coincidence involved where i got it/It (works both ways) for someone.. who got it from someone else the day i got it for him.
Dam..
Anywho
I Watched it/It (Haha!)
Halfway atleast..
Wasnt all too bad/scary actually..
Im guessing it was because we were Reeaaally insy bitsy tiny teeny back den when we first watched it..
or maybe it was the company...?
Hmmmm..
Altho i have to admit.. the Clown on the cover? is steeeel creepy...
Gotta watch Emily Rose.
That outta scare me.
I hear quiet buzzing.
Its like a subliminal message..
playing..
into my brain..
telling me to..
I dunno..
Kill someone?
Hasn't work so far tho.. Hmmmmmm...
I think i've noticed it playing..
in the background of certain songs..
whispering sweet nothings.. evil instructions..
into my innocent mind..
(OH GOD THE MESSAGE IS STILL PLAYING IN BETWEEN SONGS!!! NOOOOOOOO)
Alcoholic
Its mood n tune
seems to enhance the subliminal-ness of the subliminal message buzzing..
no wait
haha
i mean the mood it sets
seems to enhance the
erm
subliminal-ness of the sublim..
ah hell i jus like tat word.
Its a good tune anyways..
(THE BUZZING IS STILL GOING ON!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!)
maybe
maybe i was wrong
maybe
maybe it isnt telling me to kill someone
(IT WONT GO AWAY!! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE)
maybe its just der to drive me insane.
(which might lead me to kill myself. den i Wont be wrong! Heh!)
BOY was this a pointless blog. heh.
I like black. obviously.
I actually FOUND the IT dvd!
The Scary clown show from waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back that somehow everyone agrees is the Scariest show alive!
(the shows alive?)
There was this odd coincidence involved where i got it/It (works both ways) for someone.. who got it from someone else the day i got it for him.
Dam..
Anywho
I Watched it/It (Haha!)
Halfway atleast..
Wasnt all too bad/scary actually..
Im guessing it was because we were Reeaaally insy bitsy tiny teeny back den when we first watched it..
or maybe it was the company...?
Hmmmm..
Altho i have to admit.. the Clown on the cover? is steeeel creepy...
Gotta watch Emily Rose.
That outta scare me.
Monday, October 31, 2005
the suffering
comp had been screwing me lately..
everything not working..
worse of all, the keyboard..
am currently typing with mouse..
sighh..
the exasperation..
its like a mirror to my soul..
my life..
teasing me.. taunting me...
sigh..
i love my dad..
hes such a joker
heh.
this world..
its so.. far.. from the right path..
if u remember..
a couple fools entered..
unjustly..
n left..
soundly..
their time will come i guess..
theres a reason..
y no one..
none but one
saw how i really felt...
n maybe no one knows
how ive been feeling since..
now
it was still fine wen it was jus me u messed up...
but now..
uve touched my family..
the rage...
u shall pay...
n yet.. wat can i do, right?
hahaa oh wat am i saying..
n the bitch is gloating
Saintly gloating...
heh.
bitch..
Read some stuff..
Was too sweet for my own good.
haha
really?
watever tat meant..
never pictured myself
so alone..
so soon i guess..
missing a scrunchie..
leaving here for a while..
too short i say..
A Blast: "dots. (yes i am hoping tat fate will allow my dog to be named dots. coz tat wud mean something else too... =p)"
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Wishlist
So since my birthday is over and all
Id like to post my wishlist
So you guys cant get me the stuff.
haha
My mum was telling me she was considering getting me this really cute mp3 player she saw, apparently..
Which wud have been a really cool gift i guess..
Cept i have an ipod tat i didnt really use till before now..
n since i have tat itd be a waste..
Den she told me it had yellow design..
...
Damn did tat break my heart.
1. A bag. (but i kinda edi have an ok new one...hmmm...)
2. Drumming.
3. Friends. (lazy to elaborate)
4. Accesories! (except i dunno how to wear them... :( )
5. a ring... (sigh..)
6. a necklace
7. A mini diary. (procrastination. but for jotting down short lines tat keep running through my head. easier to handle den a full-fledge one, tat i already have, coz that im too lazy to touch..)
8. Chocolates goddammit!!! =P
9. pencil case
10. A car. (wow.. i jus tot of tat... was being a weeeee bit too practical. =P)
11. Soft toy. (for reasons. but u'll never understand all the conditions set into it.. wont explain it either)
12. Alcohol.
Dam ive forgotten all the stuff i wanted.. Heh..
13. A good book. (Supersticiously picked this spot.)
14. Cake!
15. A wish come true wud be nice..
16. shoes.
17. Chances.
18. An unbroken heart (not sure of this one actually.. actually has conditions.. haha..)
19. A hug..
20. To watch over you.. always...
Id like to post my wishlist
So you guys cant get me the stuff.
haha
My mum was telling me she was considering getting me this really cute mp3 player she saw, apparently..
Which wud have been a really cool gift i guess..
Cept i have an ipod tat i didnt really use till before now..
n since i have tat itd be a waste..
Den she told me it had yellow design..
...
Damn did tat break my heart.
1. A bag. (but i kinda edi have an ok new one...hmmm...)
2. Drumming.
3. Friends. (lazy to elaborate)
4. Accesories! (except i dunno how to wear them... :( )
5. a ring... (sigh..)
6. a necklace
7. A mini diary. (procrastination. but for jotting down short lines tat keep running through my head. easier to handle den a full-fledge one, tat i already have, coz that im too lazy to touch..)
8. Chocolates goddammit!!! =P
9. pencil case
10. A car. (wow.. i jus tot of tat... was being a weeeee bit too practical. =P)
11. Soft toy. (for reasons. but u'll never understand all the conditions set into it.. wont explain it either)
12. Alcohol.
Dam ive forgotten all the stuff i wanted.. Heh..
13. A good book. (Supersticiously picked this spot.)
14. Cake!
15. A wish come true wud be nice..
16. shoes.
17. Chances.
18. An unbroken heart (not sure of this one actually.. actually has conditions.. haha..)
19. A hug..
20. To watch over you.. always...
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
heartbreaker - glad being the goat
In Ed today..
Warren the 15yr old virgin (atleast im guessing he's 15 coz it sounds nice)
while trying to sneak into college parties as a college dude
shockingly, is invited in by Hot Carrie, college babe.
(where do they keep getting all these colleges anyways?! Are they jus laying around all over town?!)
they get in
she pulls him into a private room
u know somethings up
(n no i dont mean anatomically)
they make out
he strips
n den she cant do it.
cant carry out with the game apparently
where she gets a 1000 points for sleeping with a virgin.
so cliche eh?
n yet after finding out tat he was being played
he was still actually trying to convince Carrie to win that 1000 points..
are guys really all that lame?
willing to be played
to be made a joke of
jus to get sex?
will they do Anything for sex?
How exactly is it that u make out with someone you dont love?
Anyways.. if u watched.. u'd see wat i mean.. He was so lame la...
But.. guys right.. Heh..
Forgivable for all their sins..
Jus bcoz of their sex..
Totally understandable it seems...
And then, thruout the whole episode today actually
Warrens friend was trying to convince him that he shud look right in front of him for love..
Their friend Diane/Daphne.. who knows..
Diane or Daphne, watever, was always helping Warren out..
Helping him try to get 'the girl'..
And.. predictably.. at the end of the episode..
he starts to see that, maybe she wasn't tat bad after all....
But if u ask me..
Shes way too good for him..
Why is it that ppl think its ok..
To show a girl standing by the guy..
Loving him from the start..
Helping him to 'achieve his dreams'..
And when in the end he falls for her..
Its a sweet romantic love story.. ?!
I think the guys a jerk for not knowing what he had in the first place..
Why should the girl only get the guy after he's done trying to get other 'better' girls..
After he's rejected by them or something..
Why only after the guy realises that shes the one for him..
Why should the girl only get the garbage?
How is it fair that he can go out n have all the fun..
Make mistakes n not appreciate the girl who loves him..
N when he finally decides he wants her after all..
Shes all set n ready for him...
And all the while she was there for him..
Loving him..
In pain while he was off getting other girls..
Watchin him watch others..
Helping him get them in fact..
In pain when he was in pain
In pain when he wasnt....
Im sure she sees it as a good thing..
Atleast she gets the guy..
n tats all that matters...
True..
Everyones happy den..
Its jus..
unfair...
And about the game the college kids were having..
U cant really say if a guy or a girl would have the upper hand at the game..
Girls wud have willing victims.. But they might be too soft n pull out of it..
Guys wud be kejam enough to carry it out... But they'd have to spend a lil more time charming the girls..
Den again... Dont girls always fall for their charms anyways...
Notice how all these tv ppl
which technically portrays life over der
have ppl figuring out that maybe they do love that person they are with
only after getting together
after even sex maybe..
So they get together..
date, hang out, make out.. enjoy each others company...
Then only figure out they're in love?
Wats that about..
(Nathan n Hailey are Hot together... Lucas is hot too.. =P)
N den there are people who wait..
who know tat they are in love..
But it doesnt always help does it?
And so again..
How do you kiss someone you don't love?
Pressing your lips against theirs.. Telling them you love them..
When u actually dont..
How do you share an intimate act..
Something you use to let someone know how much u care for them..
with someone you dont care about..
not enough anyways..
..I think i know how...
Warren the 15yr old virgin (atleast im guessing he's 15 coz it sounds nice)
while trying to sneak into college parties as a college dude
shockingly, is invited in by Hot Carrie, college babe.
(where do they keep getting all these colleges anyways?! Are they jus laying around all over town?!)
they get in
she pulls him into a private room
u know somethings up
(n no i dont mean anatomically)
they make out
he strips
n den she cant do it.
cant carry out with the game apparently
where she gets a 1000 points for sleeping with a virgin.
so cliche eh?
n yet after finding out tat he was being played
he was still actually trying to convince Carrie to win that 1000 points..
are guys really all that lame?
willing to be played
to be made a joke of
jus to get sex?
will they do Anything for sex?
How exactly is it that u make out with someone you dont love?
Anyways.. if u watched.. u'd see wat i mean.. He was so lame la...
But.. guys right.. Heh..
Forgivable for all their sins..
Jus bcoz of their sex..
Totally understandable it seems...
And then, thruout the whole episode today actually
Warrens friend was trying to convince him that he shud look right in front of him for love..
Their friend Diane/Daphne.. who knows..
Diane or Daphne, watever, was always helping Warren out..
Helping him try to get 'the girl'..
And.. predictably.. at the end of the episode..
he starts to see that, maybe she wasn't tat bad after all....
But if u ask me..
Shes way too good for him..
Why is it that ppl think its ok..
To show a girl standing by the guy..
Loving him from the start..
Helping him to 'achieve his dreams'..
And when in the end he falls for her..
Its a sweet romantic love story.. ?!
I think the guys a jerk for not knowing what he had in the first place..
Why should the girl only get the guy after he's done trying to get other 'better' girls..
After he's rejected by them or something..
Why only after the guy realises that shes the one for him..
Why should the girl only get the garbage?
How is it fair that he can go out n have all the fun..
Make mistakes n not appreciate the girl who loves him..
N when he finally decides he wants her after all..
Shes all set n ready for him...
And all the while she was there for him..
Loving him..
In pain while he was off getting other girls..
Watchin him watch others..
Helping him get them in fact..
In pain when he was in pain
In pain when he wasnt....
Im sure she sees it as a good thing..
Atleast she gets the guy..
n tats all that matters...
True..
Everyones happy den..
Its jus..
unfair...
And about the game the college kids were having..
U cant really say if a guy or a girl would have the upper hand at the game..
Girls wud have willing victims.. But they might be too soft n pull out of it..
Guys wud be kejam enough to carry it out... But they'd have to spend a lil more time charming the girls..
Den again... Dont girls always fall for their charms anyways...
Notice how all these tv ppl
which technically portrays life over der
have ppl figuring out that maybe they do love that person they are with
only after getting together
after even sex maybe..
So they get together..
date, hang out, make out.. enjoy each others company...
Then only figure out they're in love?
Wats that about..
(Nathan n Hailey are Hot together... Lucas is hot too.. =P)
N den there are people who wait..
who know tat they are in love..
But it doesnt always help does it?
And so again..
How do you kiss someone you don't love?
Pressing your lips against theirs.. Telling them you love them..
When u actually dont..
How do you share an intimate act..
Something you use to let someone know how much u care for them..
with someone you dont care about..
not enough anyways..
..I think i know how...
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Make me a wish
I am upset about my brithday.
Gave up on a perfectly good, once a year chance to make a valid wish.
No cake. No wish.
No birthday. No celebration.
Normally, i wudnt care much for my birthday.
This year was different.
N yet, this year was the worse nothing-est. (Tnx for going out wit me tat day guys.. Jus let me rant without bein insulted?)
I know its probably just me.
Probably coz i made it tat way.
It was only nothing bcoz i cared for it to be something..
maybe..
My birthdays are nothing all the time anyways.
No license. No car.
No town. No friends.
No cake.
No alcohol.
(i never even used to care for cake. not to mention alcohol. heh.)
Maybe worse of all..
No wish.
When i need one.
dun we all...
(sigh... no wait.. tats not the worse of all....)
When im allowed to drive alone...
be it months from my birthday...
be it tat my life'd be over anyways...
i shall drive out alone
preferably in the middle of the night
get myself a lil cake
n a candle
n make myself a wish
under the stars
a wish tat wud be too late to make maybe
but somethings are never too late
i cud still drop dead the next day
(heh. bet u didnt get tat.)
hey maybe i'll get myself a tattoo
whos to say no now anyways
yes i know its me
even for reasons different than that stated above
its always me
Gave up on a perfectly good, once a year chance to make a valid wish.
No cake. No wish.
No birthday. No celebration.
Normally, i wudnt care much for my birthday.
This year was different.
N yet, this year was the worse nothing-est. (Tnx for going out wit me tat day guys.. Jus let me rant without bein insulted?)
I know its probably just me.
Probably coz i made it tat way.
It was only nothing bcoz i cared for it to be something..
maybe..
My birthdays are nothing all the time anyways.
No license. No car.
No town. No friends.
No cake.
No alcohol.
(i never even used to care for cake. not to mention alcohol. heh.)
Maybe worse of all..
No wish.
When i need one.
dun we all...
(sigh... no wait.. tats not the worse of all....)
When im allowed to drive alone...
be it months from my birthday...
be it tat my life'd be over anyways...
i shall drive out alone
preferably in the middle of the night
get myself a lil cake
n a candle
n make myself a wish
under the stars
a wish tat wud be too late to make maybe
but somethings are never too late
i cud still drop dead the next day
(heh. bet u didnt get tat.)
hey maybe i'll get myself a tattoo
whos to say no now anyways
yes i know its me
even for reasons different than that stated above
its always me
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